36%

September 3, 2015 at 10:11 pm (Uncategorized) (, , , , , , , )

we (younger sister and i) are talking about long-term relationships.

me- can you believe we have been married 20 years??? well together for 23

her- it doesn’t seem that long.  can you believe i stayed with …. (he who will be unnamed) for so long?

me- i stayed married to the first one for 10 yrs and got divorced right around that 10 year mark.  the second one he died just before our 10 mark.  it never occurred to me that i would be with anyone for that long.  wowow, it really has been over 20 years.  i kind of worried if someone was married for too long they would run out of things to say to each other.

she- oh i know, i’ve seen those couples! can you imagine?

me- that would be me, one day just say “that’s it, that’s all i got.”  can you imagine saying that to someone??  what would he say if i just looked at him and said “i got nothing for you.”

at this point we are laughing and moving on to other topics as we often do.  we all laugh more since she has arrived.  the cats adore her, well ling tolerates her but then she barely tolerates me:)  she is part of the family and fits well with all concerned.  our friends love her and she is making new friends each day.  all though we are all here together it works great for her to have the rooms upstairs and we are downstairs.  we share the downstairs actually, of course the living room, dining and kitchen.

she comes in to wake me up and much like when she was a baby she can make me smile the moment i know she is there.  unlike my sweetie, she is more persistent when she knows i really want to be up and going.  this morning she brought the time magazine i bought with the article on donald trump.  after a good laugh at his expense, i was ready and able to get in the shower and she was off doing whatever it is she does:)

she has taken me to hair appointments, nails, shopping and of course the ever-present doctor appointments.  we have had some conversations about my feelings of no hospital.  actually she was completely supportive of me not going in last week.  at first she had questions and thought if it would make me better then i should go in.  when we got down to it and how going in will not make me better, it will just make the doctors feel better.  by the way it is now in my permanent record that i “refused to go to the e.r.”  ask me if i care! i find it funny but understand they are trying to cover themselves and avoid a lawsuit.  now she is supportive and understands that i will not die in a hospital if it is at all avoidable.

not that she let’s me slide on blood work! actually she is a little nag about those things.  at my last appointment with the nephrologist he gave me lots of numbers and most of them i remember what they mean.  just before leaving his office i asked for the bottom line, what is my kidney function percentage?  he is slow to look up and when he does he clearly says 36%.  it takes me a moment before i ask, so i know some organs don’t function at 100% as we age so to put this in perspective what percentage should i be at?  again he takes a moment before saying “they should be high 90’s to 100”

even at 36% i am not in need of dialysis yet.  they did test and know i have rheumatoid arthritis, so another doctor.  for so many months i went without a doctor.  we have all experienced that bubble when we first go in and suddenly we can’t get off this ride.  i am getting ready to say “i got nothing for ya.”  the last few times i have gone in the well was dry.  i am tempted to say, i already told you everything so ……  unless you have something new?  oh wait i did that and they are sending me to a rhuematologist. all i know is i am over this getting caught up with the new doctor.

my computer battery is almost dead so i guess this is all for now.  life is good regardless of what percentage my kidneys work at, life is good and maybe in part because my kidneys work at 36%.  each day i know that i am blessed to be breathing, laughing and loving.

Permalink 10 Comments

%d bloggers like this: